Aspirin? What, you think the battery has a headache??? I have tried all sorts of things and have had zero success in 'rejuvenating' a battery with a shorted cell. Prices have gone through the roof on batteries (and tired - 100% increase) in the past couple years (thanks, wash DC...) but you might find a usable one in a boneyard. Check each cell using a VOM by probing from post to cell, then cell to cell, then cell to post with the meter set on DC volts. They should all be pretty close in voltage unless a cell is bad.
That said, I repeat that if the engine cranks and turns over but will not fire when fuel is provided, directly into the intake to be sure there's something to burn, then you likely have an ignition problem, either wires, switch or ignition module. You may check for voltage at the coil(s) while cranking to see if the ignition switch is providing full battery voltage or if it is going to zero while cranking. With the key ON, there should be volts at the coil(s), (in most FoMoCo systems).
tom