I just got called an

[Jason]

I have a friend who has a StepDaughter that was "only five minutes" late, repeatedly,,,,,,,,, and now she's going to have a baby in a couple of weeks and she isn't married, no job, no vehicle, no money, no job,,,,,,,,,, and now no college education unless she figures out something.

Interesting, but I think those two are unrelated. Being a few minutes late won't get a girl pregnant. You still have to have sex.

 

[bigcountry]

Interesting, but I think those two are unrelated. Being a few minutes late won't get a girl pregnant. You still have to have sex.

maybe all the guy needed was 2 mins hahahahahaha that gave her 3mins to get home hahahahaha

 

[naford]

Sometimes you have to where the badge of being called an a hole with pride.

The problem is that if the child doesn't understand why they are being punished then it is abuse. If the child understands why they are being punished then it can still be abuse if it is excessive. Grounding your daughter is not that bad if she undertands the reasons for it and if you reinforce the reasons. Like ask her everyday that she is grounded if she knows the reason why she is grounded. Ask her if she knows how to correct being late so it nevers happend again. When she goes to your wife to try and get the sentence reduced your wife should have doubled it. Now that being said I think that your daughter should feel comfortable enough to have both parents sit down and try to explain her side and to try and get the sentence reduced without more punishment being handed down. Down the road it is going to mean something. I have always told my neices and nephews that they can call me if they drink to much so they don't get into trouble and the parents know this and agree. I would hate to see your daughter have a problem and be to fearful of the consequences to be able to talk to you.
What I would have done about her forgetting to feed the cat is to have her miss her favorite TV program and have her sit and read to the cat for the time the program was on. I know somebody that did the reading thing as an alternative to grounding or standing in the corner.

A little story about my one nephew who got in a little trouble at school. So my brother decides to punish him by taking away his car. Well that worked well for my brother but his wife had to drive him to school in the morning then pick him up afterwards. Then to work then go get him after work. So the only one being punished was my sister in law.

 

[Jason]

maybe all the guy needed was 2 mins hahahahahaha that gave her 3mins to get home hahahahaha

LOL. At a young age I guess that could be true.

 

[bigcountry]

A little story about my one nephew who got in a little trouble at school. So my brother decides to punish him by taking away his car. Well that worked well for my brother but his wife had to drive him to school in the morning then pick him up afterwards. Then to work then go get him after work. So the only one being punished was my sister in law.

as for that my rents took my truck away ONE time and told me to find my own way to school and my own way back home for a week weither it was to call a friend or family memeber to get me and pick me up. that sucked so bad cause everyone knew i had a truck and when i would show up with a friend and had rode home with a friend it was embrassing

 

[TheBeast]

Bigcountry, I'm not calling you stupid. I respect my parents, no if ands or butts. However, I respect myself in knowing when they are being controlling versus being my parents. Mine just want to know whats going on, and otherwise where I may end up so their are no issues. I don't come home drunk, I don't not call them, and I don't mouth off or abuse the relationship. It sounds to me that your parents are overly controlling. Typical for someone who was raised in a militaristic way. Very common, as my grand father was an officer in the air force. You can be cold, and very harsh on your kids, as well as controlling, but all it does is make them bitter. My parents talk to me out of love and compassion, as they want the best for me, while also letting me live my own life. Obeying your father isn't stupid, but letting him being that restrictive of your own free will is. It's your life, do what you want with it.

 

[Hopman]

^ Amen Best! Your parents sound nearly identicle to mine. They never doled out any punishment unless there was a legimate reason, and more often then not, they tried hard to make it fit the crime and show real-world conisquence. For example, if I broke one of my sister's toys, I'd have to give up my allowance to buy her a replacement.

 

[TheBeast]

Exactly Hopman. I just try to do the best I can, in order to improve myself. Not to fit some dream they have for me. I make them happy by improving myself in anyway, not just because I'm going to get X job with a paycheck this big.

 

[Ozwynn]

She understands why she was grounded ....... today she came right home from the bus stop right on time and she even fed the cat on time with out being reminded. Again it wasn't the 5 min that bothers me ...... its the every day occurrence that bothers me..

this brings up the question though ......... when is it ok to cross the line and stop another parent from abuse?

 

[bigcountry]

She understands why she was grounded ....... today she came right home from the bus stop right on time and she even fed the cat on time with out being reminded. Again it wasn't the 5 min that bothers me ...... its the every day occurrence that bothers me..

this brings up the question though ......... when is it ok to cross the line and stop another parent from abuse?

when another parent brings your child home late and calls you an ahole to your face at your own house because she was late getting home

 

[Xandor]

She understands why she was grounded ....... today she came right home from the bus stop right on time and she even fed the cat on time with out being reminded. Again it wasn't the 5 min that bothers me ...... its the every day occurrence that bothers me..

this brings up the question though ......... when is it ok to cross the line and stop another parent from abuse?

Whew thats risky. My wife and her brother got beat as a kid by her druged out stepdad when she was very young and its really messed up her bro even today. If I ever saw a dude do the thing her stepdad did I'd go in fightin not wait for the cops.

 

[Capt Jay]

I hope that was a joke lol.

.

A complete joke. It sounds like you've got your head screwed on straight.

 

[WNY964x4]

Whew thats risky. My wife and her brother got beat as a kid by her druged out stepdad when she was very young and its really messed up her bro even today. If I ever saw a dude do the thing her stepdad did I'd go in fightin not wait for the cops.

i draw the line like my father did , if i see the person going out of their way to hurt a kid , i would step in to stop it , my dad ( Who is 5'6" tall and about 160 LBS ) once chased my aunts boyfriend ( 6'2" 265 LBS of pure muscle Vietnam Vet ) outta the trailer park with a base ball bat when he saw him throw one of their kids against a wall , needless to say he never came back. My dad and his siblings suffered alot of abuse at the hands of my grandfather , and it drove dad to the point where he spanked me once when i was little then he sat down and cried worse than i did. After all grandpa did to him and his siblings , he could never bring himself to punish me or my little brother , that was up to our mothers ( we are 14 years apart , same father , different mothers )

 

[mattpresley]

I think parents should be able to beat their kids......... I don't mean punch them in the face, but I still cringe when I'm visiting my dad and I hear him whip his belt off. I don't see a thing wrong with that. If I put a cat in the microwave (which I did when I was 5) I think I deserved some one on one time with a strap of leather. (which I got) and I guarantee you I never did it again.

Frank

Microwave?!?! When I was 4 I put a cat in a freezer(didn't understand the death concept at all). Long story short their was a catsickle in the morning. I took probably one of my first childhood beatings

 

[Funnyman141]

wow I only got hit a couple times when I was a kid the belt, the paddle and once with a broom. the last time my mother bent a metal handled broom over my a$$ and it didn't even hurt.....much
after that they sat me in a corner which was worse. An hour in the corner with adhd sucks. my dad once duct taped me to the corner because I wandered off to many times lol