Interfering with custody - felony

[Jim Oaks]

I'm going to vent for a minute. I'm posting this here because the tailgate isn't searchable on the internet. Someone out there may relate. Maybe there's an organization that would help that I don't know about.

I know a woman here in north Texas that's been going through a divorce for 3-years. It's a situation where the husband keeps paying an attorney to drag it out to keep her from getting anything. He has a million dollar dental practice and has money to throw away. He's been using his lawyer and the courts to torment this woman. They recently went to mediation and he offered to give her $250,000 to walk away from everything, give him full custody of their 16 year old son, and never talk to her son again. She refused. For years he threatened that if they got a divorce he would take her son away. He's trying to make it happen.

Her husband had her and her kids evicted from their home (he lives with his girlfriend) after the February winter storm damaged the house. He said it was so he could have repairs done, but never had any done.

He assaulted the woman (his wife) and she fled to a woman's shelter. He told the police she inflicted the injuries to her face on her own. He was arrested, but it was dismissed after he persuaded her to drop the charge while swearing it would never happen again. Typical abusive husband.

The husband had custody of their son for awhile because he told the court the son did drugs at the moms. It never happened. The court didn't even have the boy drug tested to prove the case.

The son is a great student and athlete. He competes in the junior olympics for water polo. The way this woman supports him and ensures he's getting a great education and the best coaches to get him to the Olympics is impressive.

The son refused to stay with the dad because he's an abusive dirtbag. He'd run away to the moms, and she would return him. After this happened several times the son refused to go back to the dads. The mom told him he was going to get her arrested, but he refused to go back. Although the dad knew where the son was, he didn't attempt to get him. Instead he had the mom arrested for interfering with custody.

Interfering with custody is a felony in Texas. The woman is a teacher, and she's now jobless because of this charge. She's looking at a $10,000 fine and 2-years in prison.

The husband hasn't given her or her son support in 3-years. It was ordered, but he doesn't pay it. He was also ordered to pay all of the lawyer fees for the divorce. Her divorce lawyer quit because the husband wouldn't pay them. For some reason the court doesn't enforce the orders. She's broke. She can't afford an attorney for her divorce or felony charge, and she lost her job because of the charge. She could afford an attorney if the husband paid the support like he's supposed to. He won't even let them in their house to get their belongings. She was forced to rent an apartment. The house is paid for but sits empty.

She goes to court in November for the felony. She will probably go to prison, and the son will be forced to go to his father's. He'll likely run away. It's crazy. The courts know the son is living with the mom, and they allow it, even though she's been charged with interfering with custody.

Meanwhile the son recently entered the family home to retrieve his computer. The dad has security cameras, saw him, and tried to have him arrested for trespassing and breaking and entering.

It would make for an interesting book or movie, but this is someone's real life.

It makes me sad. I hate not being able to help her. I wish I could help her get an attorney, but I just can't afford it.

The sad reality is that women are being mentally abused and tormented by wealthy husband's that can pay attorneys to do their dirty work. This likely happens more than people realize.

It's hard to wrap my head around the ideal that a court will send a mom to prison for 2-years because her son is afraid and refuses to spend time with his father, and the father makes no effort to see or provide for him. Especially when the court is letting the son live with her.

While I understand this law is meant to target parents that steal their child and flee, this isn't the case.

We live in a really screwed up world.

Sorry this isn't Ranger related.

Thanks for letting me vent. It's been a stressor for me.

 

[black_demon69]

I spent 5 years trying to get custody of my son and ended up with joint custody just to have her refuse visitation. The police would not even enforce the court order which forced me back to court. Just to have the judge take away my visitation and give her full custody because I was complaining about not getting court ordered visitation. Then she ran to Florida and I have not seen him for about 20 years. We tracked her down and waited for him to turn 18 before we made contact. He is 28 now. What really sucks is that I followed everything the courts ordered and she would blatantly defy the court and I still got SHIT on. So I feel her pain and hope that she gets through this. I wish her luck.

Suggestion setup a go fundme for her attorney fees.

 

[Ranger850]

My mom used to run "The Rainbow House" in her home town. It's a safe place for Battered/abused women with children.
The Laws for Domestic situations are ridiculous. That's all I have to say.

 

[Curious Hound]

That is really screwed up. The system is really broken. It seems to mess up more than it helps.

Glad my wife and I didn't have kids. My situation is bad enough without kids being involved. But I have it easy compared to that story.

 

[97RangerXLT]

that is ate up. and the sucky thing about it is that all it is doing is hurting both the kid and her. he is 16, so in two years he can tell his dad to eff off and not have anything to do with him. at that point for her custody is moot, But like @black_demon69 said, best thing for her is to get a gofundme started, and she obviously needs a better lawyer.

Joint custody doesn't mean squat. had that happen with my first wife. divorced when my son was 2, had "joint custody" which for Illinois meant that the parent the child lived with made all of the choices and even going back to the court meant going to "mediation" first which was a joke, and cost money to boot. Visitation rights were taken a bit more seriously, and any visitation violations she tried to get away with (2 before she found out I wasn't messing around) got the police involved and a mandatory trip to the judge to explain why. (only one of those got far enough along to get the police involved. and it was Christmas...)

AJ

 

[Dirtman]

My friend can never get a gun license because his ex called the cops on him for throwing a pillow at her and she filed domestic violence charges against him. Police and judge did not care to hear his side or even care that it was a pillow or that she had been actually assaulting him for months prior. It was just case closed and he wasn't even allowed to go get his stuff out of the apartment.

Other friends of mine had an issue with their kids where there was an "anonymous" tip of potential child abuse. My friends are amazing parents and it was all BS but the state investigated the matter (which they should) but they pushed so hard they had to hire lawyers to protect themselves. They spent thousands of dollars they didn't have to defend and protect their children. After months child services found no issues and dropped the matter but offered no compensation for what they had to pay. Their kids went through hell, they lost so much money they didn't even have Christmas gifts that year, and all because someone thought it would be funny to make an anonymous tip. The court just assumed immediately they were horrible parents and tried everything they could to prove it. At no time during the ordeal did anyone from child services even seem that interested in the effect of their own actions on this family.

Overall in domestic disputes and child welfare cases it doesn't seem like anyone looks into these situations properly. You can go to court and say anything about your spouse/ex and they just file charges without investigating the matter. Whats best for the child, or what's right or wrong don't matter at all. It's all about who has more time and money to work the court system and bury the other person in legal bureaucracy until they can no longer fight and loose everything. The legal system openly allows and essentially encourages people to ruin each other's lives.

 

[racsan]

Idk if its a “state-by-state” thing, but I thought that after the age of 14 a child of divorced parents had a say in which parent to live with?

 

[RonD]

Under the new Texas Family Code 153.009, children have a voice but in a more practical way. Sec. 153.009 allows parents to request that the judge speak with their child. If the child is aged 12 or older, the judge must meet with the child. If the child is not 12, the judge isn’t required to meet with the child.

The new law does more than address where the child will live, it also touches on visitation and a number of other issues in which the child may have an opinion or preference.
Under the new law, a child can meet with the judge and voice his or her opinions on visitation, (if the judge agrees to hear that evidence).

So a Family court Judge MUST meet with the 16 year old to get his feelings on what parent he would like to live with, the Judge doesn't have to agree with the child, but must meet with him.
Judge may also allow the child to express his feelings about why he does NOT want visitation with the other parent, again its up to the Judge ultimately not the child if visitation is allowed


Yes, it is unfair in many ways that "the golden rule" wins out(who ever has the gold makes rules)
But it is this way in many areas of life in general

That Situation sucks big time
Legal Aid is available for custody matters , its 'suppose' to level the playing field, but courts are also 'suppose' to level the playing field as well
Doesn't read like that's happening in Texas Family Courts these days


Most States, including Texas, are very reactive to non-payment of "court ordered" child support
Texas Attorney General Child Support Division is who she should contact

She should also contact the IRS about their separation(3 years ago) and any info she might have on tax "discrepancies" she might know about in his personal taxes
Use to be 10% "finders fee", lol
And he may be writing off the child support payments that he NEVER paid
He sounds like a jerk, and jerks do stuff like that

 

[97RangerXLT]

Idk if its a “state-by-state” thing, but I thought that after the age of 14 a child of divorced parents had a say in which parent to live with?

State by state... Illinois does not. If the child wants to, it is still up to the parents to make it happen. And I don't see that happening. In this case.

Blew up on me 7 years ago with my oldest son...

AJ

 

[JohnnyO]

And I got the shit beat out of me by courts and lawyers for the better part of ten years in PA.
I don't know how Texas works but as mentioned try contracting some kind of legal aid or county bar association, they usually do work for gratis.
In my experience when kids are that old the courts almost always let them live with whatever parent they want to.
In my county the husband would have been in jail a long time ago.