omg this is so funny

[tpking]

Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized.. FML

even i wouldnt admit that

 

[baxtej44]

Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized.. FML

even i wouldnt admit that

i love that website. it brings the lulz

 

[97ranger4x4]

haha i read that site every day.

Today, my girlfriend's friend told her she had seen me shopping with a cute girl. When I came back home my girlfriend punched me in the face and asked who the girl was. Apparently her friend didn't tell her the cute girl was my three years old niece. I lost a tooth because of that punch. FML

She must have one hell of a right hook!

And this is why online dating is no bueno...

Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out hes my cousin: priceless. FML

 

[Roger]

Some of its real, but sometimes I wonder how much is just made up... I swear that can't be THAT many stupid people around...

 

[Ranger22]

Some of its real, but sometimes I wonder how much is just made up... I swear that can't be THAT many stupid people around...

True. Some of the best stories are made up.

 

[shadetree]

I have a freind that knows a guy who has a friend who's dick is so small, everytime he puts his drawers on, the Fruit of the Loom Guys bust out laughing.shady

 

[Carlos Murphy]

Family

Hey, don't knock it...

I made out with a cousin once, fantastic...

Wasn't MY cousin but WTF...

 

[Mark_88]

I have a freind that knows a guy who has a friend who's dick is so small, everytime he puts his drawers on, the Fruit of the Loom Guys bust out laughing.shady

You will notice that Fruit of the Loom changed the band on their underwear...some of the new ones just say FTL...and I like them because to me it stands for Fun Time Ladies...

Well, OK...it could also stand for many things...but I won't get into all the acronyms that I can think of that pertain to underwear...or some of the negative connotations like F*(|< That's Little...

oooops...guess I just did get into it a wee bit...

 

[jcolgan_42]

i love that website. it brings the lulz

Which website is that ??

 

[triumphrider-1]

http://www.fmylife.com/

 

[pocket-rocket]

Today, I was at the gynocologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML

Today, the $300 ring my boyfriend gave me for my birthday slipped off my finger... into the toilet. I had to sift through my own poo to get it back. FML

Today, my boyfriend decided to take me to dinner to meet his parents. As we pulled into the restaurant valet I saw a woman in a slutty dress and hooker heels get out of the car ahead of us. I jokingly asked if we had accidentally pulled into a strip club pointing to the woman. It was his mother. FML

Wow, most of the chicks on that site have crappy luck...