Funniest Repair Orders you've seen?

[lil_Blue_Ford]

Customer comes in, asks for a price on a battery and if we can install it for free. Give her the price and she says that we're too expensive. Little while later she comes back, buttonholes a guy who she didn't talk to before, says she just got a battery and can we put it in for her....

Uhm....

No.... because you didn't buy it here.

 

[TheTopher]

Customer comes in, asks for a price on a battery and if we can install it for free. Give her the price and she says that we're too expensive. Little while later she comes back, buttonholes a guy who she didn't talk to before, says she just got a battery and can we put it in for her....

Uhm....

No.... because you didn't buy it here.

 

[robertc1024]

You've got to be kidding me. Can you call a woman an asswipe?

 

[dancron]

Not really a RO because i'm not a tech but my friend billy asked me to check his brakes out on his 2000 ranger. Seen the rotors were all chopped up and barely any metal left and the brakes were pretty much gone. Pulled the rotors off and it was all the way down to the vents in the back and he had no pads! Just metal to metal. Another time he asked me to check out a clunk in his front end. Sway bar link completely severed -__- At least hes learning because I make him fix it, I just supervise.

 

[Colin]

You've got to be kidding me. Can you call a woman an asswipe?

I don't see why not

 

[COPPERHEAD85]

Customer comes in, asks for a price on a battery and if we can install it for free. Give her the price and she says that we're too expensive. Little while later she comes back, buttonholes a guy who she didn't talk to before, says she just got a battery and can we put it in for her....

Uhm....

No.... because you didn't buy it here.

I get that one to...!

 

[wildfarm]

I have a couple for you. A guy I know stops one day and wants me to look at his truck. I ask him what the problem is and he tells me his tires squeal when he goes around corners. My response was you ever thought about slowing down!

Another one I had was I asked my sister when the oil needed to be changed on her car again. Her response was not for a while the gauge still shows right between the H and L some people shouldn't own cars.

Had my aunt call and asking me why her explorer was pulling bad to the right? The first thing I asked is do you have a flat tire? She said ya they both are but why is pulling in that direction? Needless to say she drove 15 miles on two flat tires and didn't see anything wrong with that.

Another one I had was a guy I know said his ranger locked up and wanted to know if I wanted it for parts. I said sure what do you want for it? I got it for a $100 bucks it was a 94 ext cab 4x4 with a 4.0. Got it home started looking at it and all it needed was a new battery cable. Had a kid offer me 2500 for it so I sold it.

 

[BRUTUS_T_HOG]

i've got another... on a ford explorer 4.0l btw

check no start... description: drove through a BIG puddle (ocean) won't start, did front end damage. sat submerged until towed out

i went out to see the damage. the grill was gone and the fenders were pushed in, license plate almost ripped off.

the thing sat so deep there was water in the cupholders so i was like this thing is fuuuuucked.

opened up the hood and took the air filter housing loose.. water started pouring out and the filter was completely saturated. then i took the intake hose off and there was water standing in the intake manifold. i thought to myself this thing is DONE it won't start. it wouldn't turn over so i knew it was hydrolocked

they wanted to check anyway so i struggled the spark plugs out, they were all dripping wet with water. then i cranked it and watched several jets of water shoot out 3-4ft on each side until no more was coming out.

put the spark plugs back in and crank... compression sounded almost healthy. after some fighting the damn thing STARTED! at that time there was a jet of water shooting out of the exhaust pipe and the exhaust was really loud from broken exh. manifold

it wouldn't idle probably from the ruined MAF sensor. but i guess you can't kill a ford even if you really try. they junked it

when we looked inside for documentation we found a picture of the drivers and the caption above read "dumb and dumber"

 

[koda6966]

I saw a video where three guys submerged a toyota in the ocean and then dug it out a few hours later. After about 15 minutes of tinkering they got it started and drove (poorly) back onto a trailer.

 

[DL BOGART]

by any chance would that be a toyota? they have had a ton of problems with the oil gelling up.

anywho..... one repair order stated, walnuts in heater....tech removed blower motor to see it full of walnuts!!! it was funny as hell! must have been a mouse storing them.

we find dead mice all the time in blower motors, always entertaining.
i will write more as i can remember them.

A Buick wouldn't accelerate. Air cleaner full of dog food! Mice strike again.

 

[DL BOGART]

here are a couple for you

when i was working in this shop back in the summer of 07 , we had this car come in , the owner left a note saying that his headlights were staying on and draining his battery , so he brought it to the shop and disconnected the battery. well i go out after lunch and open he door and pop the hood , keys are still in the shop. so i reconnect the battery cable and the headlights come on , but then i hear this rapid dinging sound. i look at the headlight switch and it is in the on position. i had to laugh at that one.

another one , did not happen to me but to one of my teachers , years ago there was this family that basically lived out of their dodge caravan ( lease vans , when they brought in the old one it would get parked next to the dumpster and literally shoveled out ) well the people were complaining that on cold mornings when they were heading up 390 , after about 20 or 30 miles they would hear this lod CCCCCCRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNCCCCHHHHH , everyday it was cold. so they brought it to the dealership , my teacher test drove it the next day ( some other idiot c tech parked it in the shop overnight ) so he drives it and hears nothing , well he realizes they did not replicate the condition. well the owner of the dealership is getting nervous because they have a loaner and he does not want it trashed. so he pays the three head guys overtime to take it out early the next morning. sure enough 20 or 30 miles in they hear the crunch , but cannot tell where it is coming from , it sounds like everywhere. so they stop for coffee ( really cold morning ) and head back out , one guy in each front seat and one in the very back. sure enough they hear the crunch , my teacher looks in the rearvies and just sees the feet of the guy in the very back seat ( laughing so hard he fell over ) it turns out that the crunch was made by a 2 liter bottle shoved under the center seat. in the cold it would suck itself in , then after 20 or 30 miles and warming up with the cars heat it would expand producing a very loud crunch. some people are just pure slobs

Found a dead dog under the back seat of our local high school science teachers caravan once. He wonder why the dog wouldn't come when he called him, and this guy has a doctorate degree!

 

[MrE_Powers]

my wife complained of a similar Sound 2 years ago. i rode with her and heard it on the second time, i found it was a damn 20 oz soda bottle.

 

[94bigsteele]

heres one from today.lady comes in and says her wiper blades keep breakin (3rd time) so i was like ok ill install them for you this time .walk out to her car to find out that she was puting her ezpass on the outside of her windshield

 

[holyford86]

heres one from today.lady comes in and says her wiper blades keep breakin (3rd time) so i was like ok ill install them for you this time .walk out to her car to find out that she was puting her ezpass on the outside of her windshield

now that's talent

 

[DL BOGART]

I don't have any auto stories, but I was a Xerox technician for 7 years.

I had one customer complaining because the bypass paper tray didn't work. When I took it apart, I found that it had strips of bacon jammed in it.

I had another customer who, as we were walking across the warehouse to the machine, was explaining to me that the machine wouldn't feed 11X17 paper. I stopped dead in my tracks (half-way to the machine) and said, "That's because you don't have the 11X17 paper tray loaded in the machine!" (I could tell from that far away.)

My final story is an office full of anti-men type women who called complaining that the copier kept jamming. When I arrived, the one woman stated very loudly that the machine "must be a man, because it doesn't work!" After finding the only problem was that the paper was all loaded skewed and crumpled, I informed her that the only problem was the "WOMAN who loaded the paper!" She was quite embarassed and was nice as pie from that day forward!

sounds like the drivers license lady when my late father went to get his wy dl after moving here from mn. She couldn't get her computer to work. Dad said "I know what's wrong". She said "What's an old fart like you know about computers?" He said: "NOT A DAMN THING! But I do know that cord has to be plugged into something. She got so pissed that she was caught being a dumbass that he had to come back 3 times and finaly get another examiner to get his license!