Oh my, I forgot entry number two! I almost forgot the Road āRaith!
also known as the casket kitchen or coffin kitchen.
We all know all the guys who play with trucks and cars always wanted a beer cooler trailer made out of a coffin. Just ask them, they wonāt deny it. The difference is, I have no self-control.
Most people donāt realize the best time to buy a cheap coffin is right after Halloween. I found this one in South Carolina last November.
A well-known soft drink company based in Atlanta had a bottling company in South Carolina. The corporate office controls the trademark and the chemistry, and the bottling companies are basically subcontractors who put it together. The bottling company in South Carolina bought this top-of-the-line Batesville casket about 15 years ago for thousands and thousands of dollars. Then they took it to a commercial kitchen company (think of a McDonaldās kitchen) who gutted it, and lined it with insulation, and fabricated a waterproof, perfect fit, container with a drain, and even lined the lids. Together with an immaculate vintage hearse, they used it for soft drink promotions in the area before Halloween.
Well, last year, the parent company got wind of it, and didnāt say no, they said āHELL NO!ā So the 15 year old $15,000 project was mine for $350.
A mechanical contracting company who used to do projects for me on mid-rise and high-rise buildings had the job to take down the giant old satellite dishes off the Cox broadcasting building in north Atlanta. The dishes were held up by custom made 22 foot long 4ā x 6ā aluminum beams. Basically 4x1-1/2 aluminum channels back to back with spacers between. I bought four of them for $150 +/-. I already had a couple light trailer axles and enough spare Ranger tires and wheels. I scored 2500 1/4 inch self tapping bolts for $25, and I had to buy 100 half-inch stainless steel bolts, nuts and washers for $75 more.
On craigslist, I found a top of the line Jenn Aire grille for $80. This was one of the originals that was made by Jade Appliance, not the cheap ones you find today. Itās built like a brick out house.
I split one of the aluminum 4 x 6 beams and used all the parts to make a trailer about 13 or 14 feet long. Aluminum is lightweight, and you can work it with woodworking tools.
I mounted the gas grill towards the nose, leaving enough space for the casket to straddle the two axles. If you do the math, when you fill the casket up 2/3 of the way with drinks and ice, itās between 1500 and 2,000 pounds, so I will be adding electric brakes to both axles. Iām on the hunt for them now.
The casket was in pretty good shape, but it was more than 15 years old, so I took out the container on the inside to just check it. Iām glad I did, because there was rust on the inside. Nothing serious, but it needed to be addressed. I wire brushed all on the inside and used some spare rust oleum paint, two coats.
I took all the hardware off the outside, and I sanded the casket and put a black and red combination on it. I mixed the black and red to make a maroon that would match, and I painted all of the handles with that. The guys here know Iām the worldās greatest fan of rust oleum. BTW, all rolled on with a foam roller or paint brush (just like two of my trucks).
A casket, no matter how heavy duty, is designed for use for 10 days or two weeks at the most. I put reinforcements on the back of all of the handles and all the way around the base for where it will be attached to the frame, nothing that would show.
I also put a trailer tongue box in the tongue of the trailer for road equipment, a Jack and car battery, and such. It was a freebie I found during Covid.
I set it on the trailer temporarily to figure out its exact location. Basically, I will have to sit on the front end to work the gas grill.
The fenders, which you can see in the first picture, were cut out of a free pick up truck cross-bed toolbox. Theyāll be strong enough for two or three people to sit on.
My original target was the 25th anniversary of therangerstation.com, but Iām an old fart and semi handicapped so I missed the deadline. Then I wanted to do it for this Halloween but it turned out Iām still an old fart who is semi handicapped. It will be a go, probably by January.
I also hauled off free another old cheap gas grill, mostly because it came with four full propane tanks. I can fit two underneath the grill.
Future plans are to finish up the gas grill and get it to work with the tanks underneath, put a floor on top of the trailer, and then permanently mount the casket centered above the axles more or less. Iām going to divide the casket into three watertight sections. One for drinks, one for food, and one for storage of cooking utensils, dishes, and such.
I have to fabricate the inside side of the long fenders, a work in process. The fenders will be painted to match the casket, three tone.
I already have a vintage Cobra 29LTD CB radio that Iām going to install, along with an AM/FM CD player. The CB radio will be used for a PA system. I have a 50 amp amplifier for that circuit, and I have two prison yard type big cone speakers. I havenāt done that design yet, but it will be atop some kind of pole that I can fold down for the road. The electronics will be mounted water tight into one of the wings of the gas grill.
I have some tubular rails from the bed of a pick up truck that I plan to cut up and make smoke stacks, two on either side of the gas grill, so I can shoot flames from the second propane tank. Design is done, and pieces in hand, but thatās one of the last things.
On the tail, Iām going to mount the spare tire Continental style like youād see on an old Lincoln.
Then, after all that, is where
@LASFIT comes in.
I love throwing lights all over my crazy projects. Iām planning on sequential turn signals on the back of the fenders, brake lights cut into the channel I will use as a bumper, triple sequence high/low brightness marker lights in the center, and reverse lights.
And it just seems like a natural to have Halloween Baby sitting on top of the spare tire with the spooky eyes, holding the license plate.
Down the sides, just like I did on the Road Ranger, I want to use high/low brightness marker lights that blink with the turn signals.
I want to put some kind of LED floodlights on the pole that will fold up to hold the broadcast speaker(s), for after dark cooking.
Iām thinking of putting some kind of purple accent lights on the inside side of the fenders along the casket. Purple is the code-3 color for funeral possessions. Iām also thinking of putting some little purple lights inside some carriage lamps I have. Iād make a candle out of a piece of PVC, and the lights are about 6 inches tall.
After all that mundane stuff, I may also do something crazyā¦.
EDIT: and it will have a āRest in Pabstā sticker somewhere and some other graphics.
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