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Depression....


snoranger

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the last 3 years have been rough for me, I have considered “checking out” but yes I know about affecting those left behind. days have been getting better, always enjoy “coming here” and was good to put some faces with the names back in sept. No I didnt do the trail ride, my current ranger only being a 2wd and we didnt sleep that great in the back of the truck that night. was still a good time and would do it again. Maybe I need to find a 4wd ranger chassis and toss this escape body on it. Im not a big talker about my issues, but I’ll talk about my ranger on and on to a perfect stranger if they ask about it. This post has me thinking about doorgunner again. Often wonder about him and hope he is ok.
I wasn't around much when DG stopped posting... did he sell the truck and sign off or did he just stop posting?
 


alwaysFlOoReD

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Just stopped posting.

A few people tried to track him down but no luck.
 

91stranger

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I'm probably the most mellow and laid back person anyone has ever met. Lost a lot of people in my life close to me and I see it as I have to keep on trucking pretty much. You can't change what has happened but you can change who you are. I learned to just roll with the punches and no matter how low life is just remember it gets better. No one's life ever just gets worse and worse and worse, it will eventually get better, believe me. I learned to find what makes you happy and do it. If you like mudding on a 4 wheeler and getting covered in mud from head to toe or just chilling with a guitar... point is, you are smiling. No one is ever frowning when they are slinging mud r doing donuts. In my eyes, depression is a choice and you can choose to either take depression out back and roundhouse kick it's face off or you can slowly go down that terrible gutter of depression. Choose to be happy, not sad. If you can't get out of the funk then you need to call someone who you know will make you laugh. I've lost more people close to me than anyone I know and I don't get depressed too often because I just don't dwell on the bad things. Dwell on the good things, not the bad and life should start looking pretty good.
 

ericbphoto

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I'm probably the most mellow and laid back person anyone has ever met. Lost a lot of people in my life close to me and I see it as I have to keep on trucking pretty much. You can't change what has happened but you can change who you are. I learned to just roll with the punches and no matter how low life is just remember it gets better. No one's life ever just gets worse and worse and worse, it will eventually get better, believe me. I learned to find what makes you happy and do it. If you like mudding on a 4 wheeler and getting covered in mud from head to toe or just chilling with a guitar... point is, you are smiling. No one is ever frowning when they are slinging mud r doing donuts. In my eyes, depression is a choice and you can choose to either take depression out back and roundhouse kick it's face off or you can slowly go down that terrible gutter of depression. Choose to be happy, not sad. If you can't get out of the funk then you need to call someone who you know will make you laugh. I've lost more people close to me than anyone I know and I don't get depressed too often because I just don't dwell on the bad things. Dwell on the good things, not the bad and life should start looking pretty good.
I agree with most of that. But I don’t think true depression is a choice. It can actually rob you of your choice to feel a certain way. It can paralyze you until you get help.

Pessimism, self-pity, etc. are choices. I had a coworker years ago who was always in a “woe is me. I always have bad luck. Nothing good ever happens to me.” Kind of attitude. I was always trying to point out the good things in his life. Always told him “You can’t just sit back doing nothing and letting life happen to you. If you want your life to be better you have to grab the steering wheel and drive. Take active positive steps toward making your life the way you want it to be. Bad stuff will still happen. But if you’re driving you can control Your reaction to the bad stuff and make better results come from it.”

Often, if you focus on others instead of yourself, you don’t notice your own misfortune nearly as much and it won’t affect you as much.
 

Josh B

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I was almost married. Almost had a kid. She got an abortion against my wishes because she didnt want to be with me in any way. How bad must you be that a woman gets an abortion because she doesn't want the kid to be associated with me?
I've heard of worse Dirtman. Actually worked with a fella in the shipyards whose wife had done him in more ways than that, claiming(as if were her right to) he had no business having kids. He was the greatest fella you'd ever wanna meet, although a lot of people never got past his thick crust. It's a pathetic world where they slaughter their offspring out of convenience sake.
You need a friend of some sort, or a group if that's what it takes. This can be an ugly world, I totally agree, but there Is life out there worth living for, it's just up to us to find it. Go to your higher power( if that's what you'd choose to call Him) if you must, but find yourself a way up out of it.
I've reached this deep dark stormy ocean for the strangest reasons, when the only way I could see was down, scary vision. You're a better man than you seem to know(I can see that from here), just don't let it go to your head ;)
Dang, day after a holiday to me is always a Sunday
 

85_Ranger4x4

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Just stopped posting.

A few people tried to track him down but no luck.
Kinda left with an ominous message too...

Dang, hard to believe that was 4 years ago already.

I'm probably the most mellow and laid back person anyone has ever met. Lost a lot of people in my life close to me and I see it as I have to keep on trucking pretty much. You can't change what has happened but you can change who you are. I learned to just roll with the punches and no matter how low life is just remember it gets better. No one's life ever just gets worse and worse and worse, it will eventually get better, believe me. I learned to find what makes you happy and do it. If you like mudding on a 4 wheeler and getting covered in mud from head to toe or just chilling with a guitar... point is, you are smiling. No one is ever frowning when they are slinging mud r doing donuts. In my eyes, depression is a choice and you can choose to either take depression out back and roundhouse kick it's face off or you can slowly go down that terrible gutter of depression. Choose to be happy, not sad. If you can't get out of the funk then you need to call someone who you know will make you laugh. I've lost more people close to me than anyone I know and I don't get depressed too often because I just don't dwell on the bad things. Dwell on the good things, not the bad and life should start looking pretty good.
I don't know much about it but I know there can be a lot more to it than that.
 

fastpakr

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Absolutely. Depression is unquestionably not a choice.

You have a choice about what you -do- in response to things around you. Feelings are not a choice.
 

Bgunner

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For those that don't know for Teenagers it is common for them to go through serious depression spells due to there hormones being so out of balance but many of them grow out of it. My point of saying this is if you have kids, family, in this age or nearing this age just keep a vigilant eye on them and take notice if it seems to get further out of control so you can seek help for them. I have 5 kids and the last 2 are entering the teenage years and since I have experienced this with my other kids it is important to share the info for all to see and know about.

As for me I have battled depression for many years now, since the age of 10, and hell have no furry like my mind puts me through. Now medicated it is no where near what it once was I still hide in my home, more so in the winter for sure, and stay away from large groups of people. One thing I have found that helps me in the winter/early spring is sugaring season. Getting out at the end of February into the sugar shack and hanging with a small group of tight nit friends that know my issues help me tremendously albeit doesn't remove all the symptoms and is still hard to get out the door. There is not a one cure all thing because depression is so subjective for a person, much like PTSD is.

I to was diagnosed with PTSD, caused from way back when I was 10, which took so long for them to realize because of my Tourettes covered my verbal symptoms and like many of you guys I keep so much inside and not tell anyone. Good thing that syndrome doesn't effect my typing.... :icon_rofl: ya'll would hate me then. The flash backs for me are traumatic in there own right but my kids see and hear them and sometimes the look on my daughters face horrifies me as bad as the flashback.

I could go on and on but really don't want to get into details that will trigger issues for me I think i'll leave it as Thanks Jim for the place to share the struggles we seem to be facing, some are the same some are different but the place to gather is a really nice thing to have.
 

Zapper

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I'm honestly glad i decided to read this post.... sure i may be much younger than everyone here, but literally anyone can have depression... like a simple sentence like "you matter don't give up" can make somebody's day... the only thing that helps me cope with my depression is driving / working on my ranger, hell even sitting in it makes me feel better, sometimes my friends cant even help me, but they have stopped me from committing suicide. But some days i feel like giving up, especially when people tell me i don't matter, which honestly happens a lot. but when i started listening to music i felt like i had more control over what happens to me, because if i don't want to hear something i can just turn it up since i always have my headphones with me and most of the time they are plugged into my phone so i can listen to it whenever i need to.
 

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I understand its not exactly a choice. I was implying that no matter how you feel mentally you still control how and what you do physically. Which means you can choose to stay home and dwell about things or you can get up and get out there and try to be positive about life. My wife has depression/anxiety and we've had foster kids with all sorts of issues so I've seen quite a bit of issues and dealt with quite a bit. When you let (kids especially) them stay in their room and not be social then they are only going to get worse but if you make them get up and get outside or doing stuff like playing a board game with family it can change someone's mindset pretty quickly. Like I said, I've dealt with more losses than most and I don't dwell on the bad stuff but thrive on the good stuff in life.
 

85_Ranger4x4

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I understand its not exactly a choice. I was implying that no matter how you feel mentally you still control how and what you do physically. Which means you can choose to stay home and dwell about things or you can get up and get out there and try to be positive about life. My wife has depression/anxiety and we've had foster kids with all sorts of issues so I've seen quite a bit of issues and dealt with quite a bit. When you let (kids especially) them stay in their room and not be social then they are only going to get worse but if you make them get up and get outside or doing stuff like playing a board game with family it can change someone's mindset pretty quickly. Like I said, I've dealt with more losses than most and I don't dwell on the bad stuff but thrive on the good stuff in life.
Yeah, it is very complex and everybody is different.

When I was young my uncle committed suicide, our family church at the time spun it it to blame him for letting the devil inside himself and not praying enough... so it is kind of a touchy subject to me. He was going thru a very bad divorce at the time, she was trying to take him for everything she could, and in our very conservative church in the early 90's divorce was a bad thing too.

And that is a large reason why I am not really churchy...

Being a history buff my mantra when things get tough is Captain James Lawrence order during the War of 1812: “Don’t give up the ship. Fight her till she sinks”
 

Mightyfordranger

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I'm glad I read through this thread as well. The members of this forum are great people. we all have our burdens to bear. I'm way to prideful I have failed at almost every project I have tried to build. That's very hard for me to admit. Its even harder for me to post that here.

Not to mention the world doesn't make sense to me like it used to. I feel people like us are seen as some kind of outsider. Its hard to meet people or carry a conversation about day to day stuff, I can't relate to people anymore.

While everyone is watching football or following the next trend online I'm reading about rangers or old diesel powered contraptions. I didn't realise that I was getting so upset at everything I couldn't relax at all. So now I just try to let things pass and accept a changing world. Then whenever I want to talk trucks I can always come here.

Also it doesn't help that i set unrealistic goals for myself, then I stress over them really hard. When in reality its only me whose hard on myself. I only recently realised this as well and I think its actually having an effect on my physical health a bit.

I'm glad I'm a member here and I'm super grateful for this thread.

This is the best forum around for sure, and its great I get to be a part of it.
 

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I am sure everybody has burdens to carry, some more so than others. I don't think I have ever experienced true clinical depression but certainly have experiences down times. Probably the closest I have ever come to depression was when my wife of 20 years decided to leave me. I was pretty down but refused to let it keep me down. I talked with God to help me and realized these burdens are part of our learning experience here on Earth. If we don't learn from them and get past them, we have difficulty going on to the next learning experience. I chose to move on with my life instead of dwelling on one hurdle. She and I eventually ended up becoming good friends and continues that way today. I don't regret one minute of being married to her. We helped each other become who we are.
I don't expect everyone or anyone to believe in my way of thinking but it very much helps to believe in a higher power to help with your struggles. At a young age I learned to build walls to shield me from pain but as I matured (that took me a long time) I learned those walls also kept the pain in. Opening up to friends helps one to deal with issues.
 

rusty ol ranger

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A legend to the old man, a hero to the child...
Captain James Lawrence order during the War of 1812: “Don’t give up the ship. Fight her till she sinks”
Reminds me of what the old truckers say...

"No matter how big the hill, no matter how heavy the load, gear that bitch down and keep the pistons poundin"
 

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Good friend of mine committed suicide my senior year of high school (2005.) I still remember it quite well. I talked to him a few hours prior and he was in great spirits, talked about some plans he had for his truck and a party that was planned that night. Next morning I talked to another mutual friend who told me he hung himself... just like that, gone. It's an awful hole in everyone else's lives that will always be there.

I think some level of depression or sadness is a normal human emotion. I also think that there's an unfair stigma attached to any amount of depression or even speaking about it and that is incredibly frustrating to me. Anyone should be comfortable talking about their current state of affairs without worrying about the potential consequences - I am referring to your doctor contacting the police for a forced intervention or some other agency kicking your door in for a "welfare check" after someone posts online about how depressed they are. Things like that.

I work in a technology field that deals with mental health concerns occasionally so I would consider myself fairly educated about all that... and it just really bothers me how someone can reach out for help and end up a criminal, institutionalized, or worse. Years ago this would be dismissed as paranoia but it's real life now. People should have access to confidential self help... the current state of the mental healthcare system is just awful.

Seems to me that many calling for reforms (not naming any names or political party affiliation here) are perpetuating the problem and making people feels like they simply cannot talk to anyone as it is too big of a risk - bigger than their existing risk of self harm, and that is simply unacceptable. We really need to be kinder and more understanding of one another.
 

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